I’m a very sexy vampire. Everyone knows it, of course. Even if the soddin’ pillocks never acknowledge it.

I’m just goin’ to slouch here in my chair all sexy like until someone comes along to see me bein’ sexy. Bet it’ll be the Slayer. I wonder if I play with the inseam of my pants if she’ll get distracted by my bulge. She’s such a hot little Egyptian.

I’d love to get that bint down on her knees in front of me. Her rosy plump lips would look so good around my cock.

Bloody Hell, now I’m hard and horny.